The Mixed Matters Journal

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

A Perfect Sunday

A Perfect Sunday
I’ve been dodging the NFL season I guess since about 2003 for reasons I’ll share with you a little later. But this past Sunday? I accidentally stumbled upon possibly the most stress free, totally enjoyable day in a very long time.
Lately I’ve had a lot going on. My job always keeps me running, even when I’m not there. I use a lot of my mental space just thinking about how to get over and get it all done in 8-9 hours a day. The past week, I’ve resumed writing as well. I’ve laid down a lot of my writing demons and I’m ready to crank out some more mystery and mayhem.
So Sunday, I lounged around and got up very late in the morning, which meant my day was starting off with a bang. I have been unable to sleep in for the past few months, so this was a welcome pleasure. Next, I decided that waffles sounded like a good breakfast with a hot cup of coffee. The waffles were excellent, and the steaming hot coffee gave me just the right pick up to get me going.
If you didn’t know this about me, I am a very creative person, and if I don’t have some creative outlet at my disposal I could literally go crazy. You know, the kind of gnawing my fingers off crazy because I haven’t found anything to do to keep my mind at peace. With that said, I have been very enthusiastically working on two sweaters -- one I’m knitting and the other I am crocheting. Finding time to do that is a chore in itself, but the house was quiet and all I had to do was plop down in front of the television with hooks and yarn flying in every direction. With a full stomach and some caffeine pumping through my veins, nothing could stop me.
I turned on the television, and with mixed feelings I noticed that the Oakland Raiders were playing the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Figuring that I could always turn the station if things went bad quickly, I dropped the remote by my side and watched with guarded suspicion. Well, the more I watched the better things got. The Raiders scored early and Tampa Bay seemed uncomfortable. I was definitely intrigued.
Needless to say the Raiders kept Tampa Bay out of the playoffs with the kind of win that I was used to seeing when Gruden was coach. What’s that you say? Gruden is now coaching Tampa Bay? I know, heh heh heh!! It wasn’t sweet revenge, but yes, it really was in a way sweet revenge. I love Gruden, but he, on that fateful Superbowl Sunday, turned my beloved Raiders into the biggest Superbowl losers in a game that I still don’t think they have quite recovered from to date.
By now you must know that I am a Raiders fan. Yes, I said it, and I can finally say it without pangs of anger, or without trying to defend my choice. They may have finished 5-11, but there’s no greater sight than to see a team at the bottom of the barrel keep a playoff contender out of playoffs. And it certainly helped that it was Tampa Bay. Believe this.
Oh, and the day just got even better. The Chargers and the Broncos. I had truly whipped myself into a frenzy and was elated when the Chargers shut the Broncos down. It was the Raiders spirit working through the Chargers, bringing chaos and wonder, shock and awe to a team that I simply cannot tolerate.
I bet I sound crazy to anyone reading this. Well imagine what I was like on Sunday! I still get hyped just thinking about it, and I am ready for bed right now and very sleepy.
I am a Raiders fan. I am also a fan that has found it extremely difficult to stomach their post Superbowl record. This past Sunday was perfect. It took me back to Raider glory and possibility, and made me remember why I love the game.

Friday, December 26, 2008

The Power of Words

The Power of Words
As I reflect on my writing career, over the past four years, I realize how many people have crossed my path for better or for worse that I would never have met had I not written a novel. I wouldn’t trade one experience for anything, but I realize a few of the experiences I’ve had have shaped my thoughts and consequently my career.
Let me start out by saying, for those that might not know, that it takes a lot of courage to place your innermost thoughts into a written work and share them with the world. I’m a typically very reserved and sensitive person, so placing myself on regular public display has taken some practice and then some.
I suppose it’s probably human nature, but I have gravitated a lot more to the negative feedback on my work than the positive. And definitely, some of it has been pretty nasty. Not so much in content, but in delivery. I do believe some people take a uniquely perverse pleasure in bringing someone else down.
With that said, I have received far more positive feedback on my work than negative -- if it were all negative, then I have to say I should have a reason to pay attention to the cutting words. The truth is, all feedback is good, or positive, kept in the proper perspective. Most people are truly only thinking of themselves, and how good they think they sound when they are telling you what they think of you.
Either way, it’s so easy to underestimate the power of words. My experiences have taught me to be more considerate when giving my opinion. There’s a lot to be said for that old saying, ‘if you don’t have anything good to say, don’t say anything at all’. It’s important to be honest, but if I can spare someone’s feelings, I certainly will by not voicing my opinion barring significant issues.
What you say really speaks volumes about what is in a person’s heart. Knowing and remembering that, I am finding new footing in being able to weather the critique storms. I certainly don’t envy mega-celebrities and the intense scrutiny they receive every single day about their looks, loves, and lives. But of course, in the world of entertainment, who cares what they are saying as long as they’re still talking about you?

Chandra Adams
Author
Shades of Retribution
Shades of Redemption (coming in 2009)
Chandraadams.com
Adrolitepress.com
Northbaymediareview.com

My Toes Is Froze

My Toes Is Froze
It was cold today, really cold. Supposedly 47 degrees in San Francisco at lunchtime, it felt a lot more like 30 degrees. My feet grew colder as I marched closer to my lunch with the wind whipping my coat open and my scarf toward the sky. I realize that anyone reading this outside of California might not feel much pity for me -- but this is California! I did expect at least a little lunchtime sunshine. I suppose my complaint wouldn’t be so bitter even, but I didn’t really get a break today from the cold until I came home from work. I think my office was almost as cold as it was outside. I bundled up in my wrap, but it was too late, the chill had already seeped into my bones. It was the same cold I felt when, in a meeting in the afternoon, I realized that some people are never going to change.
You may ask, why would someone need to change? Why indeed. Perhaps I am the one that needs to change. Even though I know better, I tend to spend an inordinate amount of time trying to figure out why someone is the way they are. This is me after dealing with a particularly obnoxious person, “I wonder why they said that”, or “I wonder if they realize that they were so rude”, or “I wonder if they had a bad childhood or traumatic life experience” and the list goes on as I kick myself for not laying down the law when I had the opportunity. What a waste of precious time on my part.
Truth be told, I can display a pretty nasty temper. I learned this as a younger woman and have learned to keep my emotions in check and my mouth shut to keep from making a bad situation worse. There are times now when I wish I had rolled my eyes and my neck and told someone exactly what was on my mind at the time of the offense, but in hindsight I am glad that I kept my cool. Some people and really very few situations are worth completely losing it.
So much of life in terms of quality is how you choose to look at situations and events. Life is so short, and the older I get I realize the less time I have to waste emotions on situations that really will resolve themselves. As I returned home I tried to shake off the day’s issues in my mind, and they eventually left me. But what did take too long to leave was the cold in my feet and in my head until I realized that I had about 3 hours to live out my leisure life before it was time to go to bed and return to work. Now Ray Charles and friends are on the television singing Christmas songs, and I think I’m going to go take in every melody and the warmth they can bring.

Chandra Adams
chandraadams.com
adrolitpress.com
northbaymediareview.com